Random VMA thoughts

Damn. Eminem looks fucking old.

What the hell is Rihanna wearing???

Was that Lil' Jon or Dave Chappelle??

Why does Lindsey Lohan look like a light skinned black girl with a bad weave???

I suppose the Chelsea Handler Lady Gaga impersonation was funny.

Why are they cutting away to the old white chick from Role Models as much as they are Lady Gaga???

Is Rick Ross really riding around in wheel chair while BMF is playing???

Best Female Video: Rooting for Katy Perry. Gaga will probably win. Adair should be there instead of Kesha. Sigh.

Gaga's shoes are actually kinda ill.

What the fuck was on Kesha's face?

Best Rock Video: Wow. The only group I've even heard of here is MGMT.

The cast of Jackass is on stage. The real jackass is the guy wearing the rubber suit. WTF??? Woops. That's Will.i.am. What the hell?

Kim Kardashian. Fashion icon???? She also kinda likes like a sistah right now. Weird. And did she get a quick little botox right before the show???

Justin Bieber. Is this really happening? Is this high school musical? I kind of hate Scooter as much as I respect and admire him.

Holy shit. Kesha is high as fuck. And why is Trey Songz mouth open this whole time???

Seriously. What is Usher wearing? And I'm mad is voice is that much deeper live.

Nikki Minaj's ass has gotten even bigger??? She's ODing on those injections.

Best Male Video: Wow. Jason Derulo is nominated??? Fuck it. The BOB song is probably the best song, but Eminem'll probably win. But a win for BOB is a win for Em anyway.

Did Katy just adlib??? Nice.

Holy shit. That mouse shit is trippy.

We've reached the part of the show where I don't know who any of these people are. NEXT.

And that goes straight into Travie? Interesting. WOW! And then they cut to commercial??? That's fucked up.

AND NERD is performing in the parking lot with Ciara? What the hell is going on??? BTW, she's flexible. Interesting how the less popular she gets, the finer she becomes.

Kanye better be part of this Taylor Swift performance.

Is it just me, or does Chelsea kind of look like Kendra.

Oh. I guess the Role Models chick is on Glee too. What the hell is this Glee shit anyway????

Best Pop Video: Let's go Katy!!!! I'm sure Gaga wins again tho. Yup. It's pretty funny that she can't walk in that outfit.

Rosario doesn't get a close up??

Poor Taylor. Come on. Something funny better happen. Oh my God. Are you kidding? Is this a forgiveness song?? Please.

ROFL. Swizz is not touching that piano. I guess TI won't be joining us. Mary still got it. Why does Drake's hand shake so much? Was Rihanna just talking shit about Drake???

Wow they gave Derulo a betweener performance too?

Did Sofia just call BOB B.O.??? lol

Best Hip Hop Video: Damn. Drake might take it. Rooting for my boy Cudi tho. Wow. Should've known Em would win.

Haha. With the pregger belly, Chelsea really does look like Kendra. That Jersey Shore jacuzzi was just stupid tho.

I guess they had Ne-Yo pair up with the jail bait because there was no threat.

Note to Swizz: Bruno Mars is really playing the piano.

BOB kinda ripped it. Shout to Gina Tucci for that one.

Oh shit. So I guess it's Paramore that sings that Only Exception song.

Who is this Pink look-a-like?

Romeo. The first Dominican on the VMAs.

Wait. What award did Bieber just win? LOL. I almost thought he wasn't gonna shout out Scooter.

New Linkin Park song was cool.

From this angle, and on TV, Cher hasn't aged.

Video of the Year: Gotta be Gaga, right? Oh shit. She can really sing.

That Aziz Ansari shit was a little wack. Sorry Jason Woliner.

Ye going in on the MP. I hope Taylor Swift comes out. You can say asshole on MTV? Is he wearing a red velvet suit by the way? Um, why was my first thought when Pusha came out that "Why is Trey Songz rapping on this track??" LOL. Trey Songz doesn't even have braids anymore.

OK. I'm done. Sound quality on this autotune is terrible, but I guess Kanye just sent a big F U to Big Brother.