While I am a Jets fan, the Jets/Giants rivalry only truly matters during the last pre-season game of every season, and once every 4 years when we actually play each other. Jets/Patriots, on the other hand, much bigger rivalry. So, I wanted to see the Giants win, but hate rooting for the underdog when the underdog is not my team. I mean, come on, I'm a Mets and Knicks fan for Christ's sake. Instead, I just watched the game from a neutral standpoint for the fun of it. Thank God I don't bet on football, because the smart money was on New England.
I must admit, however, that I was a Giants fan until they won the Super Bowl in 91. Weird, right? I honestly believe that I really don't like rooting for teams that win. Imagine how easy it would have been to be a front-runner Bulls fan in the 90s (what up Jose) or to switch my allegiance to the Yankees (like I thought my father did until I learned that he really switched his allegiance to the Mets in the 80s and then back to the Yankees in the 90s).
What really happened is that I just started using the Bruce Coslet/Ken O'Brien-led New York Jets in TecmoBowl during the off-season and went undefeated for like 10 straight-season (how you like dem apples, Belichek?), scoring 100s of TDs with Rob Moore. It even inspired me to use #85 and become a wide receiver in High School. Not even Al Toon...It was Rob Moore...I'm always rooting for that second-best, role player type of player that I feel like nobody else notices...John Starks when he was still on the bench, Adrian Murrell, Anthony Mason, LaMont Jordan, Benny Agbayani, Kurt Thomas, Timo Perez, David Lee. Whatever. Damn TecmoBowl.
In any event, what I really set out to do today was give my thoughts on yesterday's game...So, in addition to the New England Patriots, I present to you:
Other Super losers
- Fox. I don't even know where to begin. From the pre-game show "Get out and vote" encouragement to the fucking Declaration of Independence reading! What the hell was that!?!?!??!?!?! That was so tasteless. First of all, I don't need the NFL and Fox to remind me that I'm free. Second, what purpose did that serve? It's not like anyone was actually paying attention or has the ability or desire to follow a word by word rendition of the Declaration of Independence. Third, why would a black person do this commercial? Black people were still enslaved when this document was drafted. Finally, using Ground Zero as a backdrop like that is disgusting. Shame on you Rupert Murdoch.
- Jordin Sparks. She sounded good singing, but, is it just me, or does Jordin Sparks look like a dude doing Beyonce in drag? And why did some dude have his hand on Junior Seau's shoulder during the National Anthem?
- Antonio Pierce. That pass interference call in the first quarter should've cost the Giants the game. Lucky you.
- Kina Grannis. This is the chick who won the Doritos contest and got to sing a song during a Super Bowl commercial. I think the song was called "Bum Bum" or some shit. It was wack. Metaphor shoulda won. I'm sure J Records will sign and drop her. And then that Dorito commercial with the human-sized rat sucked.
- Derek Jeter. Did he actually say, "Gatorade: for every kind of 'mo there is." Hmm - subliminal message as to why he's still single? And the next Gatorade commercial asked "Is it in you?" Suspect.
- GoDaddy.com Did anyone bother to go see (what I'm sure was some BS) Danica Patrick (or whatever that Nascar chick's name is) online? Doubt it.
- Cars.com 2 wack ads.
- Stain stick. I wouldn't hire that shmuck even if he didn't have a stain on his shirt.
- Jim Carrey. Where has his career gone? Props to Jenny McCarthy though for bagging him and getting him to take her to the game. You know her career's much further down the tubes than his...And at least he made some serious money.
- Bud. That Rocky/horse ad sucked. Bring back Bud Bowl! That English-class follow-up commercial was decent, but the original was better. The flying commercial sucked. I'll give them props, however, for that one commercial that had the "Budlight: suck one" slogan. I'm surprised Derek Jeter didn't do that ad.
- Toyota. That commercial with the badgers in the Corolla sucked.
- Ahman Bradshaw. Giants running game sucked and this kid fumbled in the second quarter...Shoulda cost them the game. Lucky recovery, cuz the Pats had it. And then the illegal bat forward on the Manning fumble?!?! Jeez this kid got lucky.
- CareerBuilder. Was it just me, or when the heart jumped out of that girl's chest, who else thought it was a silicone implant?
- LifeWater. Gecko's dancing to "Thriller?" Enough with the cute/talking/dancing animals in commercials. Who hires these ad agencies?
- AntiDrug organizatoin. I forgot who ran this ad, but what up with the mid-Western junkie drug dealer reminding parents to guard their prescriptions so that their kids won't get high on Cialis, Lipitor and Nexium? Although that later Zantac commercial has me wondering if that will work for my acid reflux.
- Planters. Why you gotta make fun of people with unibrows???
- T Mobile. They could've done a lot more with Wade and Barkley. Ho hum.
- Ideacast. Why did they have this dude run around town naked? There was a perfectly fine hot naked chick with him in the beginning of the commercial. Would have made for better TV had she been running around.
- Axmen. This show will get axed.
- Tom Petty. God, he looked like shit. And was this pre-taped? You could hear "Free Falling" playing in the background during the Terry/JB half-time broadcast...This would've been much better if a breast was somehow involved. Yet they still pre-taped. Were they afraid Petty would expose himself? And when was this guy's last hit? 1991? He should've done this song:
That video was so ill.
- Pam Oliver Did she say "Green zone" instead of "Red zone"? What the hell is the Green zone? Isn't that where you drop off passengers at the airport?
- Joe Buck. This guy is such a shmuck. And he loves to say "Osi Umenyora." Don't ask me why. And WTF with "Get your flatscreens ready America?"
- SalesGenie.com. Um, their ads were pretty racist. WTF??
- Chase Blackburn. Caught as the 12th man on the field on 4th down...Coulda cost Giants the game. You don't do that in the big game. Brilliant challenge by Bellicheck, but, ha, you still lose!
- Bridgestone. Did they actually have a commercial where Richard Simmons was in the middle of the road and they swerved to avoid hitting him?
- Wall E. This is the new Disney movie, but this thing suspiciously looks like a mini Johnny 5.
- Amp. Disturbing commercial involving nipple clamps. And the NFL had an issue with Janet Jackson?!?!
- Asanti Samuel and Ellis Hobbs. The former dropped an INT that coulda changed the game in the 4th. The latter got burned by Plaxico for the game-winner.
- Payton Manning. He did not look happy when his bro won MVP. I guess all the focus will be away from him at this year's family reunion. Time for Eli to get some endorsement deals.
Other Super Winners
- The Terminator. Decent spot where the Terminator beat the shit out of the Fox pseudo-futuristic robotic football player. What the hell is that thing anyway?
- The Giants defense. Back to back sacks late in the second quarter made me think Brady can be human. Maybe it was the ankle. And then Brady fumbles in the last 2 minutes of the second quarter! 81 yards for the Pats in the first half. Wow. The crazy thing is that Brady wound up creating a Super Bowl record with number of completions (and Welker (aka the new Chrebet) with receptions) and he still looked like shit! I kept thinking during the 4th Quarter that it was about to be Brady time. Never happened.
- Pepsi Brilliant ad. Who wouldn't want to beat the shit out of Justin Timberlake?
- Bellichek Screw the Jets, and this is what you get. Sweet revenge. Well, sort of. By the way, what the hell was he wearing? And how the hell do you go for it on 4th and 13 on the 30 with the lead on the first possession of the second half...That probably cost them the game.
- Vitamin Water Shaq as a jockey. Funny. Woulda been better if were 50 Cent.
- MySpace Check out Super Bowl ads on MySpace. Brilliant. Say what you (I) will about Murdoch, but he ain't dumb.
- Hyundai No gimmicks on the commercial, but that Genesis looks like the new poor man's Bentley. Say goodbye to the Chrysler 300.
- E Trade. Aww a talking baby. It actually worked.
- Chester Pitts. I think this was an NFL ad. Best commercial of the night.
- American Airlines. Decent spot, but only cuz I had a week-long BS training in Chi-town too. I know what it feels like.
- Frank Caliendo. He's not that funny. All of his impersonations are from the 80s. But his wife's pretty hot. By the way, was LL with Kelis??
- Kevin Boss. Jeremy who? And why wasn't Shockey with the team?
- David Tyree. Touchdown catch that gave the Giants their first lead and the one handed helmet grab that saved the game. Perhaps should been co-MVP. On the flipside, he did have a huge drop in the 4th Quarter after the "catch." Plaxico made up for it.
- Chad Johnson and Ben Rothlesberger. They played better than Randy Moss and Tom Brady in the Super Bowl. LOL. E = Ocho Cinco. Decent.
- Victoria's Secret. Don't remember the commercial, but they got my attention during an exciting 4th Quarter.
That's all I got for ya...By the way, who else thought that that blue confetti they were spraying out after the game was some poisonous anthrax-type substance? I'm just sayin'...
Who were your Super winners and losers?
And will Super Tuesday > Super Sunday?
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